10 Unexpected Things That Can Strengthen Your Relationship

Feb 12

Written By A G

Strengthening Your Relationship and Learning to Communicate

Regarding relationships, we often hear the same advice: communicate, go on date nights, and never go to bed angry. While those are all solid tips, some unexpected, under-the-radar habits can genuinely strengthen your relationship in ways you might not expect.

As a therapist specializing in relationships, I’ve seen firsthand how small, seemingly insignificant things can create deep emotional bonds and long-lasting intimacy.

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1. Laugh at the Awkward Stuff Together

Most couples don’t realize that humor can be a relationship superpower, especially about awkward or embarrassing moments.

Have you ever tripped in public? Sent a text to the wrong person? Said something peculiar in front of their family? Instead of cringing forever, laugh about it together.

Why?

Laughter releases oxytocin, the bonding hormone.
Shared humor creates inside jokes, which become a secret language.
Couples who laugh together tend to feel less resentment and stress.

2. Do a Small "Favor" Without Them Asking

Most of us think love is about grand gestures, but in reality, it's often about the tiny, everyday favors.

Think:

Grabbing their favorite snack while grocery shopping.
Charging their phone for them when it’s low.
Bringing them a cup of coffee just the way they like it.

These little acts of thoughtfulness reinforce that you’re attuned to their needs—without them having to ask.

3. Create "Mystery" in the Relationship

Routine is comforting, but a little mystery can reignite attraction.

What does that mean?

Don’t always be 100% available (mystery makes people curious).
Share a story about your past that they’ve never heard before.
Send a random text like, "Guess what I’m thinking about right now?"

4. Give Each Other Space – Without Guilt

Many people fear that spending time apart means something is wrong. Nope! In fact, it’s one of the healthiest things a couple can do.

Here’s why space strengthens relationships:

It gives you new experiences to share when you reconnect.
It prevents emotional burnout (especially for introverts!).
It keeps you from losing your individual identity in the relationship.

5. Have a "Technology-Free" Hour Together

You’d be surprised how much not checking your phone for one hour boosts intimacy.

When we’re glued to screens, we miss the little moments:

The way your partner laughs at their own jokes.
The subtle facial expressions that show what they’re feeling.
The unspoken connection that comes from simply being present.

6. Compliment Something Other Than Looks

Compliments like "You’re so beautiful" are nice, but praising deeper qualities strengthens emotional intimacy.

Try complimenting:

Their resilience: “I admire how you handle tough situations.”
Their mind: “I love the way you think about things.”
Their kindness: “You always know how to make people feel comfortable.”

7. Play a Silly "Couple’s Game"

Couples who play together, stay together. And no, I don’t mean just board games—I mean your own, weird, made-up games.

Examples:

"Guess That Tune" – One person hums a song, the other has to guess.
"Grocery Store Challenge" – Pick out a surprise snack for each other.
"Random Question Time" – Ask something totally unexpected (“If we had to live in a different country, where would we go?”).

8. Let Them Vent – Without Trying to Fix It

This one is huge. Many people want to feel heard, not have their problem solved.

If your partner is venting about work, instead of jumping in with advice, try:

“That sounds really frustrating. Tell me more.”
“I can see why you’d feel that way.”
“Do you want my thoughts, or just a listening ear?”

9. Create a "Rainy Day" Fund for Fun Things

Not a savings account—a fund purely for spontaneous joy. Even on rainy days, you can take trips to see the beautiful bluebonnets (if you live in Texas) and get ice cream afterward, a local coffee shop for your favorite lattes, or a rainy day trip to a matinee movie. Whatever you decide to do, know that the fund is for a special rainy day to do something fun together.

How?

Set aside a small amount each month ($5, $10, whatever works).
Decide together what to spend it on randomly (last-minute road trip, fancy dessert, goofy gifts).

10. Give Each Other Permission to Change

Many people fall in love with their partner as they are, but forget that people evolve over time.

Relationships strengthen when you:

Embrace growth instead of fearing it.
Support their changing dreams instead of clinging to the past.
Let them be "new" versions of themselves without guilt.

Therapist Perspective:
If you and your partner can say, “I love who you were, and I love who you’re becoming,” you’ve unlocked a deeper level of connection.

Final Thoughts: The Best Relationships Are Built on the Unexpected

The strongest relationships aren’t just about love—they’re about curiosity, humor, and shared experiences.

Try experimenting with one or two of these unexpected strategies and see how they transform your connection.

After all, love isn't just about the big moments—it’s about the small, surprising ways we show up for each other every day. If you’re seeking therapy or want to learn how to strengthen your relationship, reach out to us today for more information on our services or how we can help.