Cupioromantic: What You Need to Know
Romance is often seen as a universal experience everyone naturally craves and feels deeply. But that’s not the case for everyone. Some people don’t experience romantic attraction. Yet they still want to be in a romantic relationship.
Cupioromantic people don’t feel romantic attraction the way alloromantic (romantically attracted) people do. Many cupioromantics still love the idea of dating, sharing romantic gestures, and being in committed relationships.
If you’ve ever found yourself wanting love but not necessarily feeling it like others or questioning why you desire romance without experiencing a strong emotional connection to specific people.
What Does Cupioromantic Mean?
Cupioromantic is a term used within the aromantic (aro) spectrum to describe someone who doesn’t experience romantic attraction but still wants a romantic relationship. The thing to remember is that romantic attraction and the desire for romance are separate.
Some aromantic people don’t experience romantic attraction and don’t want romantic relationships, and that works for them! However, cupioromantics like romance, even though they don’t experience romantic attraction traditionally if that makes sense.
Think of it this way: A cupioromantic person might love being in a relationship and want a committed partnership. A longing for a specific person does not drive their attraction to romance. Instead, it’s about enjoying the experience. At the end of the day, cupioromantic people still seek meaningful relationships but experience romance in their way.
How Cupioromantic Differs from Other Romantic Orientations
Cupioromanticism is part of the aromantic spectrum, but it’s not the same as being fully aromantic. Here’s how it compares to other identities:
Aromantic (aro) – Someone who doesn’t experience romantic attraction and doesn’t desire romantic relationships.
Cupioromantic – Someone who doesn’t experience romantic attraction
Demiromantic – Someone who only experiences romantic attraction after forming a deep emotional bond.
Bellusromantic – Someone who doesn’t experience romantic attraction and doesn’t want romantic relationships,
Aegoromantic – Someone who likes the idea of romance in theory but doesn’t want to experience it in real life.
What It Feels Like to Be Cupioromantic
Being cupioromantic can be a unique and sometimes confusing experience. You might crave romance but not feel the overwhelming sensation that others talk about.
For some, this can lead to frustration or self-doubt, especially in a society that treats romance as a necessary, all-consuming experience. If you don’t feel it like others, it’s easy to wonder: What’s wrong with me? Why don’t I get butterflies?
Some cupioromantic people describe their relationships as feeling more like deep friendships with romantic elements—they love companionship, emotional intimacy, and affection. Still, they don’t feel romantic longing like alloromantic people do.
The most important thing to remember is that there’s no “right” way to experience romance. If you enjoy being in relationships, that’s all that matters.
Can Cupioromantic People Still Have Relationships?
Absolutely. Being cupioromantic doesn’t mean you can’t have a fulfilling romantic relationship and it just means that your relationships might look different from traditional romance.
Some cupioromantic people prefer to date other aromantic-spectrum individuals who share a similar experience of attraction. Others form relationships with alloromantic partners who understand their needs and are willing to build a relationship based on companionship and shared experiences rather than romantic attraction.
The most factor in making any relationship work as a cupioromantic person is communication. Being upfront about how you experience romance and what you need in a relationship can help set healthy expectations and build a strong connection.
Misconceptions About Cupioromantic People
Like many lesser-known romantic orientations, cupioromanticism is often misunderstood. Here are some common myths:
Some people assume that cupioromantics are just confused about their romantic orientation, but just like any other identity, it’s valid. It’s not about being unsure; it’s about recognizing that your romance experience differs from the norm.
Others believe that cupioromantics just haven’t met the right person yet. But this isn’t about waiting for a magical moment when attraction suddenly appears. Cupioromanticism isn’t something that changes based on the person—it’s simply how someone experiences relationships.
And then there’s the idea that cupioromantics can’t have fulfilling relationships. In reality, cupioromantic people can form strong, loving, and meaningful partnerships.
How to Date as a Cupioromantic Person
If you’re cupioromantic and looking for a relationship, communicate yourself to your interests. Because most people aren’t familiar with this identity, explaining how you experience attraction.
If you feel comfortable, try:
Explain what romance means to you
Being clear about what you want in a partner
Surround yourself with people who respect your identity.
Relationships should be about connection.
Final Thoughts: Embracing Your Identity
Being cupioromantic means uniquely experiencing romance, and that’s completely valid. You don’t have to fit into traditional ideas of romance to build meaningful relationships. If you’re interested in counseling or exploring relationships, reach out today.
However you experience romance, it’s yours to define. You deserve relationships that make you feel seen.
