Making the Most of Your First Holiday Together as a Couple
Celebrating your first holiday together as a couple is exciting. It’s an opportunity to create new traditions, build lasting memories, and strengthen your bond. Whether you’re decorating for the new home you just bought together or met a few months ago and plan on meeting your partner’s family members, here are some tips for enjoying your first holiday as a new couple.
First Holiday as a Couple
Start Planning
Discuss Expectations and Desires
Before the holiday season gets into full swing, discuss what each of you envisions for the holidays. Understanding what’s most important to each of you can help set priorities. Maybe one of you values family time above all, while the other prioritizes relaxation and downtime. Recognizing these expectations early on can prevent misunderstandings and ensure both partners feel heard.
Plan Early
Whether you need to book a plane ticket to visit family or your getaway, buy tickets for holiday events, or organize your calendars around holiday parties and family gatherings, early planning can alleviate stress. If you want to visit different friends or family, it is especially important to discuss this beforehand.
Gift-Giving and Your First Holiday Together
Everyone has different expectations and feelings about gift-giving, often shaped by family traditions or past experiences. Some may view thoughtful gifts as a significant expression of love, while others might appreciate practical gifts or experiences over physical items. Discuss how you each view gift-giving, including your likes, dislikes, and any stress it might bring. This conversation can help set a comfortable tone and prevent potential misunderstandings. Feedback after the holidays: have a casual conversation about the gift-giving experience. What did each of you enjoy about the gifts? Was there something that didn’t quite hit the mark? The more communication = the more successful a couple is. Gift-giving can be seen as a language if a partner values it and they talk about it.
Creating New Traditions
Blend Your Traditions
Each person brings their own set of traditions to the relationship. If one partner is used to decorating and the other doesn’t like the holiday, you may have a conflict here, but blending your likes and dislikes with the traditions you both bring.
Start Your Traditions
Blending old and new. If you’re new to the relationship, you may want to wait to start a new tradition depending on how long you’ve been dating, but something to consider while dating. Starting a new tradition is a way to bond and create your holiday traditions. This could be anything from a holiday breakfast in bed, exchanging handmade gifts, or starting a holiday photo album.
Handling Family Dynamics
Decide Where to Spend the Holidays
Choosing whose family to visit can be one of the biggest challenges. If it’s too difficult to determine, or travel is not feasible, consider splitting the holiday, hosting a joint party, or celebrating with each family on different days (for example, early or mid-December and after Christmas). It's all about compromise here! Some couples opt to alternate families each year. Whatever you choose, communicate openly and honestly with your families to set expectations and those proper boundaries and also keep in mind that you won’t make everyone happy.
Prepare for Family Interactions
If this is your first time spending extensive time with each other’s families, prepare by discussing what to expect, including any potentially sensitive topics or family dynamics. Being each other’s support system can make interactions smoother.
Enjoy Intimate Moments
Prioritize Time for Just the Two of You
Finding time for the two of you. This may mean watching a movie together or going on a date night.
Express Gratitude
The holidays are a perfect time to reflect on your relationship and express gratitude for each other and not just about the gifts. Sharing what you appreciate about each other can deepen your connection.
Be Flexible and Communicative
Stay Flexible
Despite the best-laid plans, the holiday season can be unpredictable. Be flexible and keep up the laughter.
Keep Communicating
Continuous communication is key. Check-in with each other regularly to see how you feel as the holiday progresses. This can help avoid burnout and ensure both partners enjoy the season.
Reflect on Next Year and the New Year
After the holidays, take some time to reflect on what went well and what you might want to change for next year.
Your first holiday together as a couple is an opportunity to lay the groundwork for many festive seasons and know what works and doesn’t with you as a new couple.
Couples Counseling for New Couples
If you’re a new couple and want to seek counseling during the holidays or premarital counseling, or if you plan on taking your relationship to the following steps, reach out today to schedule a free consultation.
